Laryngecomy or not?

Today is August 31, 2024!

Many decisions have come along the way in my life but one of the biggest was my laryngectomy. Most people have a laryngectomy as a last resort. They either die or have a laryngectomy. Sometimes it's an emergency and a person doesn't even know it's going to happen but they wake up from a surgery with no voice box. I can't imagine the fear involved in that. I can't imagine not being a part of such a big decision.  

It's been a mere two years since my laryngectomy. It was 2019 I was told my cancer had returned. The doctors in my city told me I needed a laryngectomy immediately. I sought a 2nd opinion, then a 3rd opinion; all doctors were saying I needed a laryngectomy. Then a co-worker asked his doctor who had done a tracheotomy on him, and that doctor said my best option was a laryngectomy.  I had a biopsy done to determine the type of cancer I had. That doctor repeated his insistence that I needed a laryngectomy. I requested a PET scan to determine if my cancer had spread. I was told that my type of cancer doesn't spread so there was no need for a PET scan.

My daughter lives in Houston, Texas, and she suggested I go to MD Anderson for yet another opinion. She said, "mom, people from all over the world go to MD Anderson for cancer treatment. Nobody goes to Oklahoma City." So I went. They did a PET scan and determined my cancer had indeed spread to my lungs. They said if it hadn't spread, they would also suggest a laryngectomy, but a laryngectomy would not take care of the cancer in my lungs. So we tried a chemo pill for a while. It was off and on since the pill had life-threatening side effects, but I kept my voice for three more years. 

When it became apparent that I needed the cancer cut out of my neck, the surgeon said he could get the cancer without taking out my voice box. My oncologist said that I needed clear margins to make sure every smidgen of cancer was gone and that my voice box should be removed. This would make recurrence of cancer in my neck less likely.  I could change my mind up until they rolled me back for surgery. On the way to my LAST appointment before the scheduled surgery I prayed for clarity. I was unsure what to do. Yes, the Lord heals. No, he hadn't healed me. Was it my faith? I don't know, but I had to do something quickly. It became increasingly harder to breathe. I was concerned that I might pass out on my drive to Texas because it was difficult to breathe. Something had to be done. But that simple prayer, "Lord, please give me clarity" is what I needed. I met with my oncologist one last time and I was totally at peace with the decision to have the surgery. I talked to my kids and some of my grandkids and told them all the same thing. I was at peace with my decision.

I won't say it's been easy, but I can say God has been with me through it all. Sometimes I didn't feel His peace. Sometimes I was discouraged. But I'm two years out from surgery and because of that initial peace with my prayer for clarity, I have no regrets. I know this is the path I was to take. I wrote something in a journal I started the day before my surgery. I really believe the Lord spoke this to me [see to the right]. I'm finding my voice in other ways. I believe that this blog is one of those ways. I hope you are enjoying it. 

Please leave a comment to let me know you've been here!

Blessings,




Mary

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